This week, I attended the private reception for all the participants, who had taken part in the "Just As I Am" project. A nude art project, showcasing the beauty of the human body, in all it's various forms. I was feeling pretty darn nervous, I must say. This project has been so huge for me. Life-changing and life-affirming. So, I wasn't about to let a little case of nerves, keep me away. Instead, I honored my feelings. All those feelings, that I've carried around for so long, that convinced me that I was ugly, and not worth looking at. Not worth treating with love and respect. By others, and by myself. It's been quite a journey, to get to the place, where I could even entertain the idea, that I may be telling myself a lie. That all the ugly stuff, that I believed, for so long, was just a misperception. A lie that I had formulated, to try and make sense of what had happened to me...and a protection, so that I wouldn't be further hurt. I somehow, thought, that if I made myself ugly, that I could protect myself, from the perpetrators of the world. That if I padded myself with a lot of protection, that I would be safe. What I didn't realize, is that the beauty of the human spirit, shines through, no matter what. We can't hide our perfection. We can try allright...and we certainly do. But, it always shines anyway. It always finds a way to burst through. It's up to us to see it, and to allow it to be. I have spent a lot of time, working on keeping myself, all wrapped up, in this lie of ugliness; this misperception of my truth. I could be angry and resentful for that. But why? I did what I needed to do, at the time...or what I thought I needed to do. Regardless, it was what kept me safe, until I could start to see the truth. It was my protection, and I'm gently letting go of that safety net, now. I am starting to embrace the beauty in my spirit...and in my body. The beauty that has been waiting all this time, for me to acknowledge it. I see it now.
Blessings,
Robbin
Friday, February 12, 2010
Beauty of the Body...Courage of the Spirit
This week, I attended the private reception for all the participants, who had taken part in the "Just As I Am" project. A nude art project, showcasing the beauty of the human body, in all it's various forms. I was feeling pretty darn nervous, I must say. This project has been so huge for me. Life-changing and life-affirming. So, I wasn't about to let a little case of nerves, keep me away. Instead, I honored my feelings. All those feelings, that I've carried around for so long, that convinced me that I was ugly, and not worth looking at. Not worth treating with love and respect. By others, and by myself. It's been quite a journey, to get to the place, where I could even entertain the idea, that I may be telling myself a lie. That all the ugly stuff, that I believed, for so long, was just a misperception. A lie that I had formulated, to try and make sense of what had happened to me...and a protection, so that I wouldn't be further hurt. I somehow, thought, that if I made myself ugly, that I could protect myself, from the perpetrators of the world. That if I padded myself with a lot of protection, that I would be safe. What I didn't realize, is that the beauty of the human spirit, shines through, no matter what. We can't hide our perfection. We can try allright...and we certainly do. But, it always shines anyway. It always finds a way to burst through. It's up to us to see it, and to allow it to be. I have spent a lot of time, working on keeping myself, all wrapped up, in this lie of ugliness; this misperception of my truth. I could be angry and resentful for that. But why? I did what I needed to do, at the time...or what I thought I needed to do. Regardless, it was what kept me safe, until I could start to see the truth. It was my protection, and I'm gently letting go of that safety net, now. I am starting to embrace the beauty in my spirit...and in my body. The beauty that has been waiting all this time, for me to acknowledge it. I see it now.
Blessings,
Robbin
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)